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- Shush- What for Please I beg you What do you think about thepension reform Screw you Yuri Aleksandrovich Who do you think you areyou piece of shit Do it yourself - Dmitry are you well-rested- No Why You're so thin today YuriWhat happened pray tell Dammit Okay I told you this before we started but I was gonna segue from it Dmitry my schedule is not comparable to yours Are you saying we're doing this exactlyhow you planned it And in no other way I have several plans for this interviewAround 14 Let's do it then Anyway my schedule is not comparable to yours but it's gotten really crammedlately And then I suddenly discovered what happensto schedules sometimes This Sunday I probably got the worst foodpoisoning in my life Not with alcohol I was out of it for threedays - And my whole schedule flew off the rails- Right So coming down hereI thought what do YOU do in situationslike that 'Cause you're not like me I work with a fewpeople; you work with hundredsof them It's a catastrophe It is The other day I had a kidney stone move I never had that before A kidney stone startedmoving I didn't realize it at first I thought I just really needed to gobut couldn't Turned out it was a stone We're on a set Probably a hundred people I can't stop the shoot I can't 'Cause we hired this venue fora lot of money for today and tomorrow It's two days in thisvenue Big names I can't And in this state I I won't say what shoot it was but I'll showyou the happy shots of a joyful Dima Nagiyev passinga stone I'd crawl into my trailerand wail I'm calling a doctor in Saint Petersburg whomI don't actually know I met him once I was doing some testsor something and had his phone writtendown I was in Moscow I call himand say Please find someone who could help mein Moscow He says But how can I find someonein Moscow I start cryingI go I can't leave This was about 2 PM He says Okay I'll try He calls 30 minutes laterand goes I don't know anyone inMoscow but we do have a guru the man who developedall the methods all the kidney treatmentsand stuff They gave me his numberI haven't met him He's this god A worldrenowned Try calling him I call him He picks upYes I start weeping into thephone You're literally crying I'm like Please I beg youPlease He says Calm down DimaI'm ready I can see you're REALLYready Now we just need to find the idiots who'll let us in tonight In a hospital that is Give me some time He calls back an hour later and says Don't eat or drinkCome to this hospital Then there was this whole adventure of gettingthe stone out of me But the fact remainsYes disgusting business In the morning I went Doctor I wrote down some questions I'm in the hospital bed It's 7 AMI wrote down some questions And I start askingthem What about foodHe answers What about drinkingHe answers I go What about sex He says What about it I mean when canI start He says Jesus let me at least leavethe room Some people have an amazingsense of humor But the fact is I went back to the secondday of the shoot...
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